bigfoodiemama

We did alot of screwing in the utility room on Valentines night. You see married Valentines is a little different to the flower laden, gift enhanced, dinner out single version. Having eaten dinner separately ( he was stroking his bullocks.....I was starving) and put the boys to bed, I joined GASP in the utility room, in my pyjamas, as he pulled out his tool and got to work....unscrewing the panels on the side of the tumble drier. I had declared that I knew exactly how to fix the drier, having very intelligently asked the €80 an hour service man to show me what exactly he had done the last time we called him out....not a bad idea hey ! We had , in fact, paid him €80 to mop up a little water in a reservoir with some kitchen roll, thereby "convincing" the drier that the water container was not in fact full.....FFS! GASP was not exactly convinced that I knew what I was doing, but nonetheless, in an effort to save a bit of expenditure went along with me, and to his great delight,

OK, so now that I am 46 years old I have been experimenting. It wasn't really necessary when I was younger, as I just stuck to what I knew and it seemed to work fine. I was always happy anyway and had no complaints from the opposite sex. Getting older has it's drawbacks though as the same old techniques fail to deliver and I have found myself lacking in satisfaction. Some time ago I went out and bought a few items to add to my old bits and pieces and up until about a week ago, it seemed to be doing the trick, except for a few people advising me that I looked a bit pale. You will remember that, a week ago, I bought a wand, but according to The Mad One, it looks like I am going to need a the Fairy Godmother, pumpkin, mice and a large sprinkling of magic to conceal my under eye wrinkles. I arrived at her immaculate ( ha ha ! ) house this morning for a cuppa, having spent some time in my en suite applying make up and liberally waving my wand around. All week long, I have used an e

So, my attendance at the Tuesday night spinning class resumed last night, having taken a night off last week ,after having acupuncture for my ongoing butt trouble....yes, I am now allowing someone to actually put pins in my ass......no I am not a sadomasochist ! I had decided ( hilariously !) that I really must be quite fit as the spin class to date had been fairly straightforward, being a bit of a push but enjoyable and my sweat towel had gone mostly unused. The KOK's had advised me that Rapid had the bikes serviced about 10 days ago, but I reckoned this was merely a spit and polish job and would have no effect whatsoever. " Fit" and confident, I strolled into class last night. Lovely Loopy Lou took a seat on my bike, having just finished Boot Camp ( hence the loopy bit ), so I happily moved one over and positioned myself, in my Muddy Fox padded shorts, onto the new saddle, a broader, softer version of it's previous item of perineal torture...happy days. The funk