Golden coloured horizon
T.W.I.N.C. has decided he quite likes his new name, but did advise me to google it's meaning...I duly googled TWINK only to find it referred to a slender young man, the term stemming ( no pun intended) from the "golden coloured phallic-shaped snack cake, the "Twinkie", known for being of little nutritional value, sweet to the taste and creme filled, memorable more for it's outer packaging as opposed to it's inner depth....I rest my case :)
Last Wednesday night T.W.I.N.C. was in great form ( Wednesdays are always better than Mondays) As I lay snivelling on the floor about to leap up beside the Honey Monster, T.W.I.N.C. yelled "Finger Him". This followed his instruction to Macho Martha and The One Legged Scot earlier in the evening to "give me sex, two pumps and a squirt". Cautiously ( still recovering from the previous weeks " pick a window /bowl of brave incident")T.W.I.N.C. suggested that Macho might smile and look to attract his partner with a different facial expression. Macho pushed himself to full width and advised T.W.I.N.C. that this was the face he always used and had some success with, to which T.W.I.N.C. suggested that the women had been frightened into submission !
Things are going well overall. Bangin' Barry and Calamity Ali are getting their groove but you know nothing appears to go smoothly or quietly where Calamity is involved. Last night she was paired with the man originally known as Barely There Bogger, then Nearly There Bogger and now "It's all out there Bogger", as a quick move with Calamity led to the crotch of his jeans splitting during group dance number 2.Rumour that she had torn it wiht her teeth are completey unfounded. I had made the mistake of asking T.W.I.N.C. if we were doing any "group" to which I got the reply "yes ...group.... anal and oral"... I kid you not....bold as brass.
The Honey Monster is perfroming beautifully under my tuttelage ( no, that is not actually rude). I have been ramming him regularly and he has had no difficulty. I am , however, concerned that in my full skirted 1950's dress, that he may have to do some rummaging in my undergrowth to find my hands.......something to look forward to.
The Spud Farmer and Marie the Moocher, in a moment of madness left it to The Mad One, my sister , to order thier costumes.It appears she ordered her own sexual fantasy and the results are nothing short of astounding.....can't wait to see the faces on Saturday night. T.W.I.N.C. thinks the Spud Farmers "walk" during the disco style is highly entertaining. What he doesn't know is that this is exactly how the Spud Farmer approaches his marital bed on Saturdays and Wednesdays.
Barry Buttocks put in a sterling effort in the front row for group dance 2 last night...yet again I enjoyed the view and wished I was 15 years younger. Among the women however, there is only one topic of conversation.........knickers ! Great discussion has been had in realtion to the fact that a) knickers will be on show b) what colour they should be c) are cycling shorts acceptable d) would cut off leggings do a better job and e) in the case of The Wife, how many pairs of knickers she would actually have on. As my 1950's frock is still "snug" ( for snug read too tight) I considered a Spanx type undergarment, but the crotchless nature of my Spanx ( see previous post) would make somewhat more of an impression on the audience than I intend making !
Lovely Lennon and Lucky to be Alive Orla looked gorgeous in slow mation in the promo video. I actually find it easierto look at them in slow motion as at full speed, they are still scary. The Hand Jivers are doing well and Shimmyin' Shane has proven to be one of the dark horses...he is certainly impressing Leggy. It's nice to see Utterly Butterly smiling and looking relaxed as he Hip Hops and I do declare that 5 foot 3 is growing as a man, even if he can't quite get his name right on camera.
As our final week passes, we will see the females involved in shaving, exfoliation, tanning, lashing, high definition browing, manicuring, pedicuring, knicker buying, trying, discarding and replacing. The men will have haircuts,a couple of pints, a shave, a couple of pints, a shower, a couple of pints and some will brave the tanning booth on Wednesday night in the KAC Shack. Top of the queue no doubt will be Bangin' Barry, handcuffed to Calamity, followed closely by Trailer Trash, Groovin' Gary and Cool Hands Callaghan. Onlookers will include the gprgeous girls, MILF Mullarkey and Masticating Matthews, who is concerned that her mammaries, as opposed to her masticating, will be what is remembered of her stage appearance. ( The Penneys vest top is not for her !)
The Husband and Dancing Dunne will hang back shyly , but I reckon will succumb to the lure of the tanning booth. Should T.W.I.N.C. succumb he would truly be a TWINK.
Last Wednesday night T.W.I.N.C. was in great form ( Wednesdays are always better than Mondays) As I lay snivelling on the floor about to leap up beside the Honey Monster, T.W.I.N.C. yelled "Finger Him". This followed his instruction to Macho Martha and The One Legged Scot earlier in the evening to "give me sex, two pumps and a squirt". Cautiously ( still recovering from the previous weeks " pick a window /bowl of brave incident")T.W.I.N.C. suggested that Macho might smile and look to attract his partner with a different facial expression. Macho pushed himself to full width and advised T.W.I.N.C. that this was the face he always used and had some success with, to which T.W.I.N.C. suggested that the women had been frightened into submission !
Things are going well overall. Bangin' Barry and Calamity Ali are getting their groove but you know nothing appears to go smoothly or quietly where Calamity is involved. Last night she was paired with the man originally known as Barely There Bogger, then Nearly There Bogger and now "It's all out there Bogger", as a quick move with Calamity led to the crotch of his jeans splitting during group dance number 2.Rumour that she had torn it wiht her teeth are completey unfounded. I had made the mistake of asking T.W.I.N.C. if we were doing any "group" to which I got the reply "yes ...group.... anal and oral"... I kid you not....bold as brass.
The Honey Monster is perfroming beautifully under my tuttelage ( no, that is not actually rude). I have been ramming him regularly and he has had no difficulty. I am , however, concerned that in my full skirted 1950's dress, that he may have to do some rummaging in my undergrowth to find my hands.......something to look forward to.
The Spud Farmer and Marie the Moocher, in a moment of madness left it to The Mad One, my sister , to order thier costumes.It appears she ordered her own sexual fantasy and the results are nothing short of astounding.....can't wait to see the faces on Saturday night. T.W.I.N.C. thinks the Spud Farmers "walk" during the disco style is highly entertaining. What he doesn't know is that this is exactly how the Spud Farmer approaches his marital bed on Saturdays and Wednesdays.
Barry Buttocks put in a sterling effort in the front row for group dance 2 last night...yet again I enjoyed the view and wished I was 15 years younger. Among the women however, there is only one topic of conversation.........knickers ! Great discussion has been had in realtion to the fact that a) knickers will be on show b) what colour they should be c) are cycling shorts acceptable d) would cut off leggings do a better job and e) in the case of The Wife, how many pairs of knickers she would actually have on. As my 1950's frock is still "snug" ( for snug read too tight) I considered a Spanx type undergarment, but the crotchless nature of my Spanx ( see previous post) would make somewhat more of an impression on the audience than I intend making !
Lovely Lennon and Lucky to be Alive Orla looked gorgeous in slow mation in the promo video. I actually find it easierto look at them in slow motion as at full speed, they are still scary. The Hand Jivers are doing well and Shimmyin' Shane has proven to be one of the dark horses...he is certainly impressing Leggy. It's nice to see Utterly Butterly smiling and looking relaxed as he Hip Hops and I do declare that 5 foot 3 is growing as a man, even if he can't quite get his name right on camera.
As our final week passes, we will see the females involved in shaving, exfoliation, tanning, lashing, high definition browing, manicuring, pedicuring, knicker buying, trying, discarding and replacing. The men will have haircuts,a couple of pints, a shave, a couple of pints, a shower, a couple of pints and some will brave the tanning booth on Wednesday night in the KAC Shack. Top of the queue no doubt will be Bangin' Barry, handcuffed to Calamity, followed closely by Trailer Trash, Groovin' Gary and Cool Hands Callaghan. Onlookers will include the gprgeous girls, MILF Mullarkey and Masticating Matthews, who is concerned that her mammaries, as opposed to her masticating, will be what is remembered of her stage appearance. ( The Penneys vest top is not for her !)
The Husband and Dancing Dunne will hang back shyly , but I reckon will succumb to the lure of the tanning booth. Should T.W.I.N.C. succumb he would truly be a TWINK.
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