bigfoodiemama

So the time had come to collect my new varifocal glasses, GASP having " given the gift of sight" for Christmas. It was Christmas eve and I reluctantly headed into Specspenders, feeling slightly flat at the prospect of my Christmas gift being an indication of my advancing age and increasing disability. Well, I must have been good all year, because Santa Claus decided that , as a reward for such a practical gift, it should be delivered in gift wrap....and gift wrapped they were ! I was asked to take a seat ( yes, in the place they tell you the bad news), removed my old blurry pair of specs and a blurred individual sat in front of me ( yes I am that blind !)and handed me my new glasses. As my eyes adjusted, what came into view was a blond middle aged Australian in a Christmas t shirt, exposing his perfectly toned biceps and hairy forearms........Yeeeeeessss !!! Happy F***** days ! He leaned forward and gently adjusted my glasses, in a soft Australian accent telling me they look...

The Christmas gift this year from GASP has NOT got me excited. The lovely GASP ( apart from when he says at this time of year " It's only one day!" ) very kindly suggested that he give me some money to get myself some clothes, Santa Claus kindly looking after the book, perfume, bottle of Chablis side of things. With delight I hit a well known store who have a section specifically for the 40+ age group. I have no need for designer clothing or labels but wanted a few key items for my " capsule" wardrobe. Sadly it appears that women over 40 in Ireland are deemed to have short legs as the 3 pairs of trousers I tried on flapped around my lower shins...well they would have flapped if they weren't also " slim fitting" .....What I ask is wrong with trousers being straight like they used to be as opposed to be so that I can balance my hourglass figure ( well hide parts of it anyways!) I gave up , disgusted that being 2 stone slimmer appears not to actually...