Oooh er missus !

" If you have removed your undergarments I will be round in 15 minutes "
Fact 1.These are the actual words of a text I received yesterday
Fact 2. I did not receive this text from my husband
Fact 3. It was from a man
Fact 4. He did come round 15 minutes later
.
.
.
.to see my Shiela's Maid
Now, interestingly enough, Newly (not so) single was round a the time. She is the person who introduced me to the concept of suspending a Shielas Maid clothes drier from my utility room ceiling, so that my smalls would waft above me, instead of staring me straight in the eye ,on the inside line. I say "waft" as if they are small and flimsy enough to "waft" but that is in fact a severe case of poetic license, as my smalls ( larges) give the impression of someone having parachuted into the utility room, their chute having got caught just before they crashed to the floor ! Newly single and I greeted the Chicken Man on his arrival and I confirmed to him that I had removed all the undergarments, before he ventured into the utility room. His wife, the Ban Garda, had asked him to come look at Shiela as she wants one before the arrival of baby number 4. With the wisdom of a man whose wife is pregnant, he plans to do exactly as he is told, hence the recce misssion. Newly Single and I extolled it's virtues before reminding the Chicken Man that size is important.As he surveyed the contraption and decided he could build one himself, I sang the praises of his free range chickens to Newly Single, telling her of the night I left his house (with GASP) drunk and hugging a frozen bird. The Chicken Man duly headed off, having avoided any sight of my under garments. I waved him off saying " I am looking forward to seeing your erection " ....funny day !
www.shielamaid.com